Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 47

Thread: Other Instrument Jokes

  1. #1

    Other Instrument Jokes

    Please share any good (clean) jokes you know about other instruments. (Tuba or Euphonium jokes have their own topics.)
    Dave Werden (ASCAP)
    Euphonium Soloist, U.S. Coast Guard Band, retired
    Adams E3, Denis Wick 4AL (classic)
    Instructor of Euphonium and Tuba
    Twitter: davewerden
    Facebook: davewerden
    YouTube: dwerden
    Owner of TubaEuph.com, DWerden.com

  2. #2

    Other Instrument Jokes

    VIOLA:
    I'll start the topic with my favorite viola joke.

    Question: How do you get a viola player to play a measure of 16th notes at pianissimo?

    Answer: You write a whole note and put "solo" over it.
    Dave Werden (ASCAP)
    Euphonium Soloist, U.S. Coast Guard Band, retired
    Adams E3, Denis Wick 4AL (classic)
    Instructor of Euphonium and Tuba
    Twitter: davewerden
    Facebook: davewerden
    YouTube: dwerden
    Owner of TubaEuph.com, DWerden.com

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    West Palm Beach, FL
    Posts
    3,156

    Other Instrument Jokes

    How many band conductors does it take to change a light bulb?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    We're not sure. No one ever watches the conductor.
    Rick Floyd
    Miraphone 5050 - Warburton Brandon Jones sig mpc
    YEP-641S (on long-term loan to grandson)
    Doug Elliott - 102 rim; I-cup; I-9 shank


    "Always play with a good tone, never louder than lovely, never softer than supported." - author unknown.
    Symphonic Band of the Palm Beaches
    When the Saints Go Marching In (arr. Mashima) at ACB Conference Ft. Lauderdale
    Cell phone video of : El Cumbanchero:

  4. Other Instrument Jokes

    Q: What do you call 2 viola players playing in unison?

    A: A diminished 2nd

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    West Palm Beach, FL
    Posts
    3,156

    Other Instrument Jokes

    What do you get when you mix a diminished chord with an augmented chord?
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    a demented chord.
    Rick Floyd
    Miraphone 5050 - Warburton Brandon Jones sig mpc
    YEP-641S (on long-term loan to grandson)
    Doug Elliott - 102 rim; I-cup; I-9 shank


    "Always play with a good tone, never louder than lovely, never softer than supported." - author unknown.
    Symphonic Band of the Palm Beaches
    When the Saints Go Marching In (arr. Mashima) at ACB Conference Ft. Lauderdale
    Cell phone video of : El Cumbanchero:

  6. #6

    Other Instrument Jokes

    Great Jokes-- especially about the Viola solo... I have known people like that, LOL!!

    Smitty

  7. Other Instrument Jokes

    The orchestra conductor had become ill just 15 minutes before the concert was to begin. The manager asked around if anybody could conduct the evening's program and was delighted when the second cellist volunteered. The cellist knew all the works and didnt need a score for Brahms' third. At the end of the concert the orchestra was pleased, the manager was pleased and they ended up asking the cellist to conduct for the next three weeks while the regular maestro recuperated from an emergency appendectomy. The three weeks went by quickly and soon the maestro was back on the podium. When the second cellist took his customary seat beside the violas Sam, the principal violist, leaned over to him and asked, "where the hell have YOU been for the last three weeks?"

  8. Other Instrument Jokes

    So this jazz musician dies and finds himself being led by a demon down a tunnel into Hell. The door to Hell has a small window in it revealing a smoke-filled room, and as they enter, the musician realizes Hell is a jazz club. The demon points to an empty table, and they sit as the musicians are just coming out to get ready for the first set. The band is Charlie Parker on alto, John Coltrane on tenor, Miles Davis on trumpet, Jaco Pastorius on bass, Bud Powell on piano, and Art Blakey on drums.

    "What's so bad about this?!?" the newly deceased musicians blurts out in disbelief.

    "Well, Satan has this girlfriend," the demon says. "And she sings a little."

  9. Other Instrument Jokes

    These western vacationers find themselves on safari in the deepest, darkest jungle in Africa. They gradually become aware of the rumble of drums somewhere off in the distance.

    Noticing their worried expressions, their seasoned African guide tells them, "It's okay. It is only bad when the drums stop."

    Venturing further into the dense forest, their sense of foreboding returns as the incessant, ominous pounding grows louder and louder. "It is only bad when the drums stop," their guide reassures them. They press on.

    As they round the bend at the base of a great mountain, the drums, much closer now, rise to a tremendous crescendo, then abruptly stop.

    "Oh, no!" the guide screams, "Bass solo!"

  10. Other Instrument Jokes

    how do you get two oboe players two play in tune? shoot one of them in the head.
    Gregory E. Lopes
    Euphonium player
    US Navy Band Great Lakes
    US Navy Music Program, 2009-Present

    Besson Prestige 2052

Page 1 of 5 123 ... LastLast

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •