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  1. Sale ended 24 August.

    Sale ended 24 August.
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    Three days to go and bids now up to $1800.

    Three days to go and bids now up to $1800.
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    Q: What's the definition of a gentleman? A: One...

    Q: What's the definition of a gentleman?
    A: One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!
  4. Thread: Tuba Jokes

    by David Bloss
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    The tuba makes a wonderful weapon. The lowest...

    The tuba makes a wonderful weapon. The lowest notes are used to call in elephants for the stampede.
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    What do you call a beautiful blonde on the arm of...

    What do you call a beautiful blonde on the arm of a trombone player?

    A tattoo.
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    Where do piccolos come from? Once a year,...

    Where do piccolos come from?

    Once a year, along the Italian coast, the first pressing of extra virgin olive oil is dumped in huge vats and set over giant bonfires on the beaches. Locals gather up...
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    You know that bulb on the bottom of an English...

    You know that bulb on the bottom of an English horn? It's really an oboe seed. Plant it and an oboe grows. An English horn is just a fully mature oboe.
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    A trombone is a wind-powered, manually-operated...

    A trombone is a wind-powered, manually-operated pitch approximator.
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    Music major? Your college instructor is your best...

    Music major? Your college instructor is your best source of information of what he/she will allow. Will probably direct you to a source of the best horn you can buy for your budget.

    I suspect...
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    RickF ... yep, that's on my list.

    RickF ... yep, that's on my list.
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    # is now at 49. Got a copy of "The Lambs March"...

    # is now at 49. Got a copy of "The Lambs March" at last rehearsal. Let the fun continue!
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    I was in the same position (read treble clef,...

    I was in the same position (read treble clef, only part available bass clef) years ago. But since the music is so cool, and I WAS the euph section of that band at that time, I learned to read bass...
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    Was being played by Mr. Birnbaum (owner of the...

    Was being played by Mr. Birnbaum (owner of the general store). One of John Wayne's greatest movies. All the best John Wayne movies had plenty of humor, and over my many viewings of "McClintock" I've...
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    Back in February, the Heart of Texas Band did an...

    Back in February, the Heart of Texas Band did an all-James-Barnes concert. One of the pieces was his Concerto for Euphonium and Wind Band. Soloist did an outstanding job. On the way home from the...
  15. Yep, I'm still laffing!

    Yep, I'm still laffing!
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    Stolen from a better known musician, so you get 5...

    Stolen from a better known musician, so you get 5 bonus points if you identify where they were stolen from ...

    1) Definition of a trombone: A wind-powered, manually operated pitch approximator.
    ...
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    I've learned to view ANY claims with skepticism...

    I've learned to view ANY claims with skepticism after watching every episode of "Pawn Stars".
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    Wow, thank you! The version we've been playing...

    Wow, thank you! The version we've been playing was edited by Charles Wiley, but I compared my treble clef baritone and the bass clef baritone parts and didn't find any differences.
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    Kai Winding

    A few years ago I saw a baritone advertised on E-bay that supposedly was owned / played by Kai Winding. It looked like a King or Conn bell-front baritone in decent shape. The seller was asking about...
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    Dave Werden: I know your reply on this thread is...

    Dave Werden: I know your reply on this thread is several years old, but the information you mentioned might still be around.

    The Comal Community Band plays Alte Kameraden every year at...
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    Sousa March life list

    I've started keeping track of the Sousa marches I've played. To date, I'm 48 out of 136 (or whatever his total is).

    I'm sure many have played more than I have. Anyone done the complete cycle yet?
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    My wife is a Cracker Barrel addict. On vacations,...

    My wife is a Cracker Barrel addict. On vacations, rule #1 is only ONE Cracker Barrel visit per day. A few years ago we took my dad to visit his brother in North Carolina. 2000 miles (round trip) on...
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    Probably correct ... not sure who first said it...

    Probably correct ... not sure who first said it but it's true for most woodwinds "An ill wind that nobody blows good".

    Shall we start a series of posts based on dissing other instruments. "How do...
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    Thanks, Dave. I can only get away with the Conn...

    Thanks, Dave. I can only get away with the Conn in my German band, since it no longer has a finish and is held together with a hose clamp where the lead pipe broke away from the bracket. I only play...
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    On the CD "Blazing Brass" by the Salvation Army...

    On the CD "Blazing Brass" by the Salvation Army New York Staff Band, the S&S piccolo part was played on tuba. Salvation Army bands have no woodwinds. The rest of the tuba-featuring tracks on the CD...
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